Cindy’s Story

I was fortunate to have a blessed childhood, growing up in a home where I always felt loved and unconditionally supported. My parents had the time and energy to truly listen, to be present when I needed to talk, and to gently guide me as I matured into adulthood.

When I reflect on why I wanted to become a mentor, it’s because I want to share that same kind of support—the kind that made such a meaningful difference in my life. I want to be that extra someone in a young person’s life, someone they know they can count on. After all, isn’t that something we all want or need at some point? 

Being a Big Sister to Skyllar has enriched my life in so many meaningful ways. Our shared love for animals helped us bond quickly—honestly, I think my dogs might like her more than they like me!

Spending time with my Little Sister is a different kind of joy than spending time with my own children. Without the responsibilities of parenting, I’m able to be more fully present and simply enjoy our time together as friends. Whether we’re off on an adventure or just hanging out, she keeps me laughing. Even the simplest moments—being silly or chatting—are special.

It’s been such a joy to watch her grow from a funny young girl into a confident teenager. Our friendship is truly mutual, and I feel lucky to be part of her life.

In my 30 years with the Big Brothers Big Sisters of North Simcoe (BBBSNS), I have been a Big Sister, a board member, and an In-School Mentor. I have met first-hand the young people who find BBBSNS an essential part of their lives. Mom and/or Dad work crazy shifts to make ends meet – and sometimes they don’t meet or there is only one parent struggling to do the job of two. As a parent now, I understand how fortunate I was and that while my parents made it look easy, all parents need help from time to time. Intentional mentors are there to hold the energy or the extra support for young people; working as a team with parents and our agency to provide these young people with the best possible outcomes for their future.

The word essential is used often these days. Some needs—like food, shelter, and medicine—are clearly essential. But what about the essentials that aren’t so obvious?

For many, it’s a privilege to have received what we might call developmental essentials: having someone who expresses care, challenges your growth, offers support, includes your voice, and helps expand your sense of what’s possible. While that exact phrasing may not be familiar, the experiences likely are—friendships, trusted confidants, emotional support, people who showed us different perspectives, and those who championed us when we needed it most.

However you define it, these developmental essentials are what help young people grow into strong, confident, and essential members of our community. They are the building blocks of a better future. That’s why I’ve chosen to volunteer with Big Brothers Big Sisters of Northern Simcoe for the past 25 years.

All young people deserve to be listened to, to be offered new perspectives, and made to feel important. Parents, our agency, and mentors come together to do that, during normal times and the unfamiliar. So, while it may not seem obvious, Intentional Mentorship is essential and why I am ready and determined to equip our Littles for the challenges that face everyone in our new normal.

-Cindy McQuirter-Fairley